I Won't Give Up Yet!

Okay, I decided I'll keep it up and use this for 15 minutes of "me" time too. Or throw a note up when I can. So....what to write about today?.. Well, we had our first snow today! I was so excited to wake up this morning and see snowflakes falling and sticking! It was as if the Christmas season was being ushered in. So we'll have our annual "Snow Party" today. We usually make paper snowflakes and then bake snowflake-shaped cookies or something. Of course, now later in the day, the snow is gone. Hopefully, it'll come again soon. If it's going to be cold, I want something to show for it.


These were the good ol' days.


On another note, my smallest child is not sleeping, as usual. He's not been taking his afternoon naps and it's driving me crazy. Oh, I still put him up in bed and yesterday after an hour of being up there he fell asleep. He doesn't cry the whole time but off and on he whines and hearing that is also maddening. The funny growling noises he makes are good though. I think this means it's time to cut out the morning nap. I did this the other day as a trial. He did sleep in the afternoon, but I dealt with gremlin baby the whole morning. So, I guess I need to figure out what's more important. Gremlin baby or complete "alone" time, gremlin baby or complete "alone" time. I know for right now, I need an oreo. :0)

Should I Even Bother?

I don't know how you do it. I keep trying and trying and failing miserably - that is, in keeping my blog updated. How do you guys get the chance to type out a wonderful entry while balancing kids, chores, jobs, more chores, and "you" time? You pretty much amaze me. So I'm grappling with whether or not I should just close this site down and be done with it. I don't know if people even read this...maybe I'm talking to myself here....

Up Way Too Late

The time on the computer clock reads 2:44am. Yes, I'm still up. My mom left tonight, I was paying bills and searching online for a job. I know this isn't the best time to do these things, but honestly I sometimes don't know when else I could do it. I guess I need to take a time management course someday when I have time. Right now, I just need to get to bed...

Not Sure What I Just Did

I want my blog to look more "put together" like some of my other friends. However, all I found was just changing the template and I'm not so sure what I need to do to increase my aestetics. Keeks, Juj, T-Rex some help, please?

The Unassailable Logic of a Three-Year-Old

Here's a conversation Brennan had today with the nursery worker at church:

Michelle - "Brennan, do you need to go to the bathroom?"
Brennan - "No."
Michelle - "Well, maybe Thomas on your underwear needs to go pee."
Brennan - "But Thomas doesn't have a penis."
Michelle - "Does your penis need to go pee?"
Brennan - "No, but my testicles might."
Michelle - "Do your testicles need to go pee?"
Brennan - "No, they don't have a penis."

There you have it, folks!

Missing My Friends and Family

I've really been missing my friends and family a lot lately - those that aren't nearby, that is. I got to talk with a couple of good friends from seminary today and though it wasn't very long, but the laughter came easy and the love that I have in my heart for them just longed to give them big hugs. I've been very bad at keeping in touch lately: calling people, checking emails, updating my blog, and notoriously going on Facebook.

I've been trying to figure out the problem and I honestly don't know what it is. I mean sure, I have two kids that are little and church activities or other social obligations, but so does everyone else and they seem to go on Facebook every day. So I'm trying again. I think I need to have a set time that I do computer stuff. A specific hour a day could be good. I think part of my problem is I always feel something pulling at me and I feel bad being on the computer when my laundry is out of control, dishes are piled up, and dust bunnies are watching Ni-hao Kai-lan with Brennan. I'm not going to give up though, so please, dear friends and family, don't give up on me either. Please know you are loved so very much - even if I'm not online.

Three Years Ago Today...

So of course I gotta start off my post like this. Because in all honesty it is truly unbelievable that Brennan is three years old today. Sure every mom says this when her little one has a birthday...because it's the truth. In many ways, the three years seems like it has gone so slow because a million other things have happened: we were in the middle of seminary, the process of getting a job, graduating from seminary, me leaving a job, leaving good friends, moving, meeting new friends, oh and the birth of a second child just to name a few.

On the other hand, it seems like these three years have flown by. Sometimes, I look at my "big" boy and I have a vision of him taking his first steps or I'm trying to remember when he couldn't talk. And with Aidan looking so much like Brennan as a baby I feel like I have deja vu all the time. We sat down with Brennan the other day and watched the DVD we made of his first year of life (Christmas present to all the grandparents back in '06 - definitely recommend doing this) and he loved seeing himself as a baby. He kept wanting to watch more "episodes." And of course, I'm beside him blubbering.

It happens so quickly. However, as much as I miss seeing him as a baby, I love getting to know him more as a person. All the clever things he says, his little facial expressions, his big heart, how he's learning - all of these things are what makes it get better. So I'll cherish the past, soak in the present, and look forward to what he'll be like in the future. After all, he is one one cool little man.

A Funny Conversation

So Don and I had some welcome and needed time away from the little ones this past Thursday. We decided to go to a nice lunch together at BJ's Brewery - a place I missed from the SoCal days - and then do a little shopping followed by a movie. We had a great time together, but the nicest little highlight of my day was when we stopped into a game store to look at some board games. Don was over looking in one section and I was around the aisle looking in another. Following is what I was privy to overhear:

Saleswoman: "Sooo,...you found the coolest game section."

Don: "Absolutely." (no eye contact)

Saleswoman: "I like to play strategy games too...unlike some other women."

Don: "Uh huh." (still no eye contact)

Saleswoman: "I play (some games I don't know/remember), but I also play Risk and Stratego, so I'm not a complete nerd or anything."

Don: "Oh, wow."

Saleswoman: "Settler's of Catan is a good one."

Don: "Yeah, that is a good game."

The conversation stopped there because another patron asked the saleswoman a question. So you can guess my response as I overheard this woman hitting on my husband, for if you didn't realize it that was what she was definitely doing, I was crackin' up inside! I stood there with a little smile on my face the whole time as she listed as many of her fine attributes as she could in 30 seconds. I mean I can't blame her, I think Don is quite good-looking myself. It was just really funny and I wish the other patron hadn't bothered her...I wanted to see how long it would be until she gave Don her digits.

Busting on the Buffets

If you read our family blog, you saw that last week we were in Myrtle Beach on a family vacation with Don's family. It was super fun and I truly enjoyed being surrounded by Canadians the whole week :0). However, there was one part in particular that I do not have fond memories of: the seafood buffet.

First of all, I am NOT a seafood person. I do like salmon and tuna, with the little bespectacled tuna guy smiling back at me. But I draw the line there: no crustaceans, no bottom feeders, nothing that could possibly move off of my plate. However, my husband does like seafood and I knew that he really wanted to get some great seafood being by a beach and all. So it was with sacrifice that we went to a seafood place on a double date with my sister and brother-in-law, Connie and Chris.

Now we weren't searching for a buffet because none of us really wanted that. We wanted just a nice seafood place. Unfortunately, everywhere we looked said "buffet." Finally, we saw a place that made no mention of buffet but did say "fresh local seafood." We were all hungry so we ended our expedition and went on in. We should've known something was up when Blackbeard the Pirate greeted us at the door and then the host asked if we had any coupons. As he walked us through the restaurant, we of course saw that it was a buffet. I inwardly groaned, but we kept on moving to the table not sure if we should leave right then. Hush puppies and sauce were shoved in our faces and Don started eating them right away. Even after that, we were still ruminating whether or not we should leave. In the end, our stomach growling won and we stayed.

I never realized how much I truly disliked buffets or seafood until that evening. First of all, it was super expensive. This made me mad because it's a rip off for two reasons: 1) you're never going to eat the amount of food you'd need to offset the cost and 2) the food is never really that good. Now I don't know if my tastes have become more discerning through the last few years or if I'm just missing the simpler buffet days (and way cheaper!) of Ponderosa (awww man, did I used to LOVE some Ponderosa). Second, is the quality, as I just mentioned. You never know how long the food has been sitting, no matter how "fresh" they claim it is. So Connie and I decided to split a steak and baked potato and get the salad and dessert bars. Don & Chris opted for the seafood buffet.

I began with my salad and had to avert my eyes from all the hapless creatures staring back at me at the seafood buffet. I thought the salad bar was not bad, but my nice thoughts ended when I tasted a seafood-flavored cucumber, like it had been soaked in the little critters' bath water. Who knows, it was probably my mind playing tricks on me, but the damage was done - no more salad. Well, our steak finally arrived along side Larry the Lobster, Chris' extra entree and I about barfed because there he was in his entirety - beady eyes and all. Meanwhile, Don is cracking legs and shells on the other side of me and I couldn't even look over. I tried my steak, not bad, but not worth the price we paid. After all of this, Connie and I headed to the dessert bar and our hopes went up when we saw the treats. We grabbed a bunch of things, thinking the rest of the meal would be redeemed. Alas, we were mistaken.

The best part of the evening was being sans kids and getting to hang out with Connie and Chris. The worst, well, reread the above. So, with the exception of breakfast buffets, I think I'll stay away. Unless, the buffet somehow finds me again...

The Longest Day...

Four pairs of pajamas, two sets of sheets (one washed twice), three pillows, and one bottle of pedialyte equals the longest day ever. Brennan started throwing up last night around 10:00pm and it didn't end until about 10:00am this morning. Needless to say, by the time I got the two boys in bed tonight I felt like I'd been awake for three days in a row. I'm now sitting and relaxing with Don. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a much shorter day. :0P

Ready for a Change

So the presidential race is over - finally! I'll tell you I was really getting tired of things by the end. But I was excited with the outcome. For a while I was torn about who I was going to vote for. I definitely liked and respected both men. And in either case our country would make history with either the first female VP or the first African American pres. Both very cool. I thought John McCain could bring a lot to the presidency just as he has to the senate for the last three decades. He's experienced, fair-minded, and patriotic among other things. However, I also thought Obama could make a great president, too. He's compassionate, motivated, and goal-oriented among other things.

What it came down to for me, and why I voted for Barack Obama on Tuesday, was that after looking at both candidates' positions on the issues, I realized I agreed on more things with Obama and was excited about a number of the changes he proposes. On some of the social issues, I obviously disagreed with him, but I also disagreed with John McCain on some. And really on a number of the issues, such as immigration, they were very similar in their views and proposals.

I also appreciated that, throughout the campaign, Obama seemed to articulate his plans better and specify what exactly he wanted to do. I felt McCain was a little more vague. So while John McCain's 30 years of experience in the Washington establishment is good and has been a great service to our country, I believe that having someone who has not been entrenched in Washington as long can be a good thing. Someone with some fresh approaches and a willingness to do things a little differently. My wish now is that no matter who we all voted for, the divisions of the parties can come together and work with our new president to make this country - our country - the one that we all hope for.

Being a Mom of Two...

...is freakin' hard! Not that I expected a walk in the park, but seriously it's A LOT. Of course, I'm enjoying being at home with my boys, but it's quite convenient how you forget what it's like to have an infant (I believe this memory relapse is the only way people have more than one) and top that with a 2-1/2 year old who has just recently decided to enact his two-year-old tantrum rights and you have simply, mayhem.

OK, not all the time. But it gets a little crazy on those days when everything happens at once. I need to remember that Aidan is only 6 weeks and we are still in "survival mode" as I dub the first three months. So things will get better and I will find the time to eat, bathe, and clean the house, right?

*Disclaimer: The third child above is not mine...that cutie (Ella) belongs to my girlfriend Kate, who is also a newly minted "mom of two".

Veggie Monster? C'mon!

(Copyright 2008: ally.escapist.nu/cookiemonster/)

So I heard that the geniuses at Sesame Street are thinking of making a change: turning Cookie Monster into Veggie Monster in response to the childhood obesity epidemic. Now, in my research on Google and even on Sesame Street's website, I didn't turn up any concrete evidence confirming this and in fact only found information saying the rumors are not true (and have actually been around since 2006). It makes me very happy that no change has been made.

First of all, cookie monster has been a cultural icon for so many children since the late 1960's. Second, as I recall from my own childhood, Cookie Monster ate more than just cookies. In fact, he'd eat just about anything within his fuzzy, blue arm's length including fruit, vegetables, meat, letters, salt and pepper shakers, etc. Third, as my friend Darren pointed out, whenever he ate cookies, most of the goody went flying around him and didn't even get in his mouth, and many times he'd have milk with them. But most important, doesn't the fight against childhood obesity truly rest with the most influential people in a child's life - that is, the parents?

I won't deny that snack companies and the fast food industry prey on the sweet-tooth cravings of our kids and so it's good, to some extent, that they're being called to a higher level of responsibility, but really who is the most responsible? Parents. We can't shirk our responsibility nor can we rely on culture to help our kids know what healthy foods are and to eat healthy portions and to have healthy limits on sweets. We have to tell that to our kids, and more importantly model it for them.

So it's good that Sesame Street isn't making any crazy changes regarding the googly-eyed monster we all adore. Change needs to take place at home and I'll tell you, in our house, the Strawberry Monster definitely works for Brennan (especially when it's his dad).

Wow! A New Record!

So it seems that I was averaging a blog post about once a month, but now I've gone above and beyond in my posting skills (or lack thereof) and am posting TWO months after my last post. Kudos to me, right?.....

Okay, maybe not. But trust me, if I posted every time I thought about something funny or wry or just plain ordinary, then there'd be a ton on here. Problem is I have a two year-old and unlike some "supermoms," I have yet to find a good balance between writing and taking care of him, oh and then cleaning (both the house or myself), running errands, doing something fun, yadda yadda. So, try as I might, the blog falls to the way side until a good friend points out that I haven't posted in many moons, or my own inner conscience demands that I sit down for two minutes to write something. As it is, it's 11:00pm right now and I really need to go to bed.

So, you'll have to wait until my next post to hear about Brennan's most recent funny sayings, our trip to CO, or our first trip to the ER for Brennan (don't worry there was no real damage). If you're intrigued enough, hopefully you'll come back and check to see if I've posted before August :0).

P.S. This is Brennan's "Risky Business" pose. Just like blogging seems like risky business to me lately...is the connection there? I'm grasping folks, work with me :0P

Going It Alone

So I am officially on a "break." Well, for about another 18 hours. I'm currently sitting at a bed and breakfast not far from our house. After a very stress-filled last few weeks and just feeling a bit weary the last month and a half, I finally declared to Don that I was feeling burned out and needed a break. A true break. Not just an hour or two by myself or the three of us together, but actually leaving them and spending some time alone.

So my wonderful husband got the idea and booked me an evening at a very affordable local bed and breakfast and took Brennan for most of the day today and all day tomorrow. We also did squeeze in a little dinner date tonight by the generosity of some friends who took Brennan for a couple of hours.

So after an early baby doc appointment this morning and my MOPS meeting, I was on my own. I told a couple people about my solo adventure and they all asked, "So what are you going to do?" And I realized that I had no clue. It's been so long since I've truly been alone, no little one tagging along, no husband hanging on my every word :0), not even the cat twisting around my legs to get some attention. Alone.

So I began by grabbing myself a bite to eat, then browsed in Old Navy for baby and mommy clothes, then wandered over to Barnes and Noble and got caught up in the latest issue of People magazine. None of these seem like very astounding or magnificent activities, but it was wonderful to be able to do it. Sometimes it's the simple things that are most appreciated.

This evening I've been relaxing here at the B&B, chatting up the proprieter, and now doing some writing (yes, I realize it's been almost two months but, as I said, craziness). After breakfast (being made for ME), I'll do some reading/devotions and just spend some time in prayer before checking out. This is the other thing that I've been longing for. Time alone...with God.

Yes, I know I can have that when Brennan's napping, but when no one has any undergarments to wear, the dishes are going on strike from not being cleaned, and the dust bunnies are taking up permanent residence on the couch to watch TV, my mind gets preoccupied.

So this time away is also time with. Time with the one who I've been missing a lot lately and feeling drawn in to spend that quality time together. Time with the God's living word. Time with God's presence. As it says in Ecclesiastes, "there's a time for everything under heaven." Well, this is now my time.

I Hate Being Sick!

Well, I've been sick for the last three days now, and I mean really sick. Everything aches, I get tired walking from the top floor to the bottom, Brennan feels about ten times heavier to me, coughing, sneezing, etc. etc. I really hate being sick and also being pregnant (i.e. can't take any drugs to help), having to keep track of an energetic toddler (i.e. "Let's watch the Elmo again, Brennan."), and trying to keep the house somewhat clean (i.e. I guess I really should wipe up the apple juice that was spilled on the floor...).

But through all of this, I've been thinking about today, Ash Wednesday. Unfortunately, I don't think I'll be able to make our church's Ash Wednesday service, which stinks because Don is leading it and it sounds like it will be powerful. Our church is focusing on service through this time of Lent. About going out. So as I've thought about what to give up - maybe chocolate again (although this never works with Valentine's Day and my birthday in there), TV, beets? - I realize one of the best things I can give up, or rather give, is my time. Time is precious to all of us and I realize all to often that I don't give enough of it to God. Be it in devotions, service, volunteering, whatever. So many times, I say, "I just don't have time for that", when in reality I know I have the time if I make the time.

So that's what I'm going to do this Lent. I'm going to give my time - even if it's a half hour - and see how God works.

Just Plain Sad

So yes, I've also heard the news of Heath Ledger's untimely death. When Don told me I was shocked and said how awful it was. Initially Don attributed me saying this because he was an actor. While "10 Things I Hate About You" is one of my favorite movies and I've always appreciated his acting mettle, really, it's sad because he was young, seemingly healthy, and left behind a beautiful two-year-old daughter. It's sad when anyone, actor or not, dies at such an age when life is supposed to be just beginning.

And what REALLY is sad is the following quote that I took from an MSN article:

"Outside the Manhattan building on an upscale street, paparazzi and gawkers gathered, and several police officers put up barricades to control the crowd of about 300. Onlookers craned their necks as officers brought out a black body bag on a gurney, took it across the sidewalk and put it into a medical examiner's office van.

As the door opened, bystanders snapped pictures with camera phones, rolled video and said, "He's coming out!""

This is ridiculous and disgusting. It's bad enough that paparazzi dog these people when they're alive, but to have people screaming and taking pictures as a gurney is rolled out bearing his dead body?! Get a grip! I remember my brother, who lives in this same NYC neighborhood, telling me how he saw Heath Ledger at the laundromat one day and how cool he was. This was a man, plain and simple, and to have his death denigrated and made to be some circus show is just plain sad.

I guess I should grab my camera when I head to my next funeral.

Wild Kingdom

Okay, maybe my friend Heidi is rubbing off on me. We used to frequently go for walks in the mornings at Princeton along a pretty canal that ran behind our apartment buildings, both for the exercise and the fellowship (something I dearly miss). And it would never fail that at some point during our walk she'd see some woodland creature. A bird, deer, fox, snake, turtle. It was as if they came out just to say "Hi" to her. I used to call her Dancing Cloud.

So I just looked into my backyard and I was astounded by the amount of birds I saw. There were four blue jays, two woodpeckers, and - I'm not even kidding you - 30 robins. Now trust me, spring is no where near here. It's currently 18 degrees out, but it feels like 4. So why they're all flying around and chirping all over the place has got me, but it was a welcome sight and a pleasant reminder of a great friend. I believe I can call myself Running Water now.

Sisterhood

So I stayed up late the other night (even though I know I shouldn't have) watching Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. It's based on a book, which I have not read, but if the movie is any indication the book must be really good. If you haven't read the book or seen the movie, it's basically about a group of four girlfriends - one of whom is named Bridget, funny! - who are going to be apart for the first time over a summer and how a pair of jeans knits them all together (pun intended :0).

Now it could be because it was late, it could be because my hormones are out of whack, but I found myself crying a few times over as I watched. When I thought about it the next day, I think what really got me was the girls' deep friendships and it made me think of how I have been immensely blessed with wonderful female friendships throughout the phases of my own life. High school, college, seminary. They all brought me friendships that I cherish to this day. And I think that has been one of the hardest things moving to Ohio - I simply miss them.

But my comfort is this. If a pair of pants can keep friends together, how much more can God keep us together - me and my friends. Our friendships are based on a foundation that will not give way. A foundation that is solid, true, and deep. So for all of my beloved friends reading this post, this is why I know that even though miles separate us, our friendships will stand the test of time. And for me, that is enough right now.

P.S. FYI, there's a "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2" coming out. Hmmm....those must be some pants. I gotta get me a pair.

New Year; New Look!

Well, I've decided to freshen up my blog a bit and give it a new look to celebrate this new year. A little simpler looking, a little more color, and a little more...more. Don helped me with the sidebars and other fun stuff. I'll add some more things with his assistance soon, and yes, I do plan on blogging regularly. I won't call it a New Year's resolution, let's just say I'm making some changes. :0)